


I, Dildo

by Amuly



Category: Marvel 616, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Fisting, Anal Sex, Animate Object, Blow Jobs, Come Swallowing, Crack, Dildos, Dirty Talk, Fingerfucking, Fisting, Fluff, M/M, Masturbation, Masturbation in Shower, Miniaturization, Object Insertion, Shrinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-14
Updated: 2014-04-14
Packaged: 2018-01-19 08:05:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1461931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amuly/pseuds/Amuly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony gets shrunk down to fourteen inches tall. After he and Steve find out the situation will resolve itself in a day, they head back home together. And Tony has some suggestions as to how they can spend that day. Sexy suggestions. Weird, sexy suggestions.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I, Dildo

  
  


Steve fought down the cold knot of dread forming in his stomach. It'd be okay. It was always okay. Someone would have a solution for it. Reed or Bruce or... someone. This wasn't going to permanent.

“Good news! It isn't permanent.” Bruce snapped off his gloves and tossed them in a trash bin.

Steve took a step forward. “It's not?”

Bruce shook his head. “Judging by the degradation of the electron field around him, it'll reverse itself twenty-four hours from the incident. So twenty-three hours from now.”

From his perch on the examination table, Tony waved his hands. His tiny hands. His... teeny, tiny, little hands. Steve hurried over and gazed sadly down at him.

“Could you hear that?” Steve asked.

Tony nodded. Cupping his hands around his mouth, he shouted: “Lower your voice!” It came out squeaky high.

Dropping his voice down to a whisper, Steve replied: “Sorry.”

“Thank you! That's better! Now get me to my lab so I can hook an amplifier to my throat and I don't have to scream!”

Bruce's head popped up at that. “Oh, I have one. Just your size, too.” Rummaging around for a moment, Bruce came up with a ziplock bag. Inside was a tiny little chip, maybe one centimeter by one centimeter, at most. “It's a back-up for Jan or Hank, if their standard ones go out.”

Tony waved his hands up at Bruce. “Gimme!”

With a pair of tweezers Bruce carefully extracted the chip from the ziplock, then passed it off to Tony. After a moment of fumbling around, Tony's voice said: “Testing, Testing, one, two, three, Steve Rogers has the best ass this side of Hydra, one, two, three.”

Steve frowned down at Tony. “We can hear you just fine,” he told him.

“I'm sorry, what was that? Didn't catch it. Let me try again: Steve Rogers' ass-!”

“And that's enough of that,” Steve grumbled. Carefully he scooped Tony up in one hand. Tony stumbled and fell against Steve's palm, arms wrapped tight around his thumb.

“Hey! Warn a guy!”

Ignoring Tony, Steve looked to Bruce. “So he'll grow back to normal size in twenty-three hours?” Steve asked.

Bruce nodded. “From what I can tell, it's going to be an all-at-once kind of thing. He's not going to slowly grow in size over the course of the day. Once minute he'll be a foot high, the next, six feet.”

“Six feet _one_ ,” Tony grumbled. “And I'm fourteen inches right now! You said!”

Steve sighed and brought Tony into his chest, where he could cradle him more safely. “Any other instructions?”

Bruce shook his head. “None that I can think of. He'll probably be starving when he sizes back up, since he'll be eating microscopic meals over the course of the day. Other than that, proceed as normal?”

“Thank you, Bruce.” Steve reached out with his left hand to shake Bruce's, still holding Tony against his chest with his right.

“Anytime.”

As they left the medical rooms of the helicarrier, Steve peered down at Tony in his palm. “Anywhere in particular you want me to take you?”

“Strip club.”

Steve lifted his hand and glared eye-to-eye with Tony. “Anywhere else?” he grumbled.

Grinning, Tony took a few awkward steps across Steve's palm. Once he was close enough, he leaned in and pressed a kiss to Steve's nose. “You know I'm kidding, hot stuff. How about home? We can watch shitty movies you've never seen and see how many pieces of popcorn I can eat. I'm betting two.”

Against his will Steve found himself smiling. He stroked one finger gently over Tony's head. “Alright. Though I think you'll have to sit in my pocket for the car ride...”

Tony was already shaking his head. “Nah. Put me in the cup holders!”

* * *

The second Steve deposited Tony on his massive, more-than king-sized bed, Tony was chattering at him.

“We should have sex with me like this.”

Steve snorted as he headed for the bathroom, to relieve himself and change into something more comfortable than his uniform. He needed a shower, too.

“With what? Matchsticks?” Steve called out after Tony.

“Hey, come and get me. I need to pee.”

Steve walked back out to the bed and picked Tony up, then brought him to the bathroom and deposited him in the sink. Tony looked down at the drain below his feet, then shrugged. “Hey, good idea. Better than holding me over the toilet.”

“You can shower in there, too,” Steve pointed out. “If you want one.”

“These are all remarkably clever suggestions. Were you thinking about this the whole drive over or something?” Tony asked as started to tug off his undersuit.

“You know me: I like to plan ahead.”

“Do _not_ tell me you actually have a 'if one of my teammates gets shrunk down to a foot tall' contingency plan,” Tony told him. “Actually, no, you know what: you _don't_. There's no way you do. You're fucking with me, Rogers.”

Steve laughed as he stepped out of the last of his uniform and deposited in the laundry basket (the one reserved for “work” clothes). 

“Knew it,” Tony said proudly. “Hey, alright, turn on the faucet and toss a bar of soap in here. You're right: might as well get clean while I'm at it.”

Steve returned to the sink to find Tony had stripped himself and tossed his miniaturized undersuit up onto the bathroom counter. Gently Steve picked up the clothes and set them to one corner of the counter. Presumably they'd resize when Tony did, but no point losing them in the meantime.

A naked Tony was peering up at Steve from the bottom of the sink, tapping his foot impatiently. Steve leaned down to rest his chin on his hand as he looked at him. “Do you want me to pull the plug up for the sink so you can take a bath?”

Tony shook his head. “Nah, just turn on the hot faucet. And soap, come on.”

Obediently Steve deposited a bar of soap next to Tony in the sink, then turned on the hot faucet. He held his hand under the water and tempered it with the cold faucet until it felt right. “How's that?”

Tony was straddling the soap, running his hands along its surface curiously. He dunked his head under the water when Steve spoke. “Awesome. Alright, go take your shower, I'll be done by the time you are.”

Steve snorted. “I'm not leaving you in the sink to drown. I'll wait until you're done.”

Tony rolled his eyes as he lathered himself up with hunks of soap torn off from the bar. “I'm not an inch tall, Steve. I'm over a foot. I'm not going to  _drown_ under a faucet.”

“Better safe-”

“ _Fine_ , fine, I'll be quick.”

Patiently Steve watched Tony bathe himself. Normally it'd be erotic, watching his partner wash himself. Now it was more a curiosity. His penis, Steve couldn't help but noticing, was about an inch long. It was all very proportional, all the same ratios as Tony was when he was full-sized. Just... shrunk down. To the size of a collectible doll. 

“Like what you see?” Tony asked. He turned around and wiggled his little ass at Steve as he washed his hair. Steve laughed. He even had the same tan lines he did as when he was full-sized.

“Just finish so I can take my own shower,” Steve ordered him. He punctuated his request by jabbing Tony carefully with one finger. Tony laughed as he stumbled.

“Hey, you know, I was serious when I said we should fuck.” Tony turned and continued soaping his body as he faced Steve. “I'm kind of _super_ into the idea of sucking your cock when I'm this size.”

Steve snorted. “What are you going to do? You can't fit it in your mouth. It's practically the same size as you are.”

“Uh, okay, exaggerating much? I'm fourteen inches, Steve. Even on your _best_ day-”

Steve rolled his eyes. “It's still not much smaller than you. Your hand couldn't wrap around it. I don't think both your hands could.”

“But my arms could,” Tony pointed out. “Come on. I always say I want to climb you like a tree. Now I can slide around your dick like its a stripper pole. And don't you want my teeny tiny tongue lapping at your slit? It's small enough to go inside.”

Tony's hand slipped down between his legs as he spoke, ostensibly to clean himself. But his penis—small as it might currently be—was getting hard. Steve's eyes were good enough to spot that.

“Tony...” Steve grumbled.

“Steve...” Tony groaned, too sultry and sexy to be coming from something fourteen inches high.

“Are you done? I need to shower.”

“Sure. Lift me out.” Tony raised up his arms.

Carefully Steve scooped Tony out of the sink, then deposited him on a hand towel on the counter. Tony wrapped himself up in it and sat down on the counter to watch Steve. 

“Clean your asshole,” Tony told him as he got in the shower. Steve shot Tony a _look_ as he stepped in. “What?!” Tony asked from inside his towel wrappings. “Don't you want me inside there? Could fit both my arms in there, if you want. Or my legs. You could fuck yourself with me.”

“I shouldn't have let Bruce give you that voice amplifying chip,” Steve commented. “Then I wouldn't have to listen to this silliness.”

Tony hopped up to his feet, hand towel still wrapped around him. “I'm being serious! Come on: when are we going to get the chance to do something like this again? We should make the most of it. I know you like being bigger than me, throwing your weight around, being able to manhandle me. Now-”

“Is not even close to the same thing,” Steve pointed out. He poured shampoo into his hair and lathered it up, rinsing it out efficiently. He moved onto his body after that, squeezing gel into a loofa and scrubbing himself with it. He didn't waste any time soaking or just standing around under the hot spray. Old army habits died hard.

“Come on, Steve. Wash that ass for me. Don't you want me inside you? Aren't you in the mood for it? We were planning on it tonight, before. Treating you to it, since we do it that way around so rarely. This little inconvenience is no reason to cancel our plans. Just think of me like an unusually articulate vibrator—for more than one definition of 'articulate.'”

As Steve scrubbed lower across his body, eventually his hands reached his hips. “I'm washing myself now because I  _always_ wash myself thoroughly and not because of you,” Steve pointed out as his hands drifted over his rear. From on top of the counter, Tony hopped up on his tiptoes. The hand towel slipped over his eyes. Tony pushed it back, black hair sticking up in harsh contrast to the white towel.

Briskly Steve scrubbed his ass, soaking up the crack. He wanted to turn away from Tony, to avoid looking at him. But turning away would just mean exposing himself  _more_ to Tony, given what he was trying to hide. So Steve found himself staring Tony down as he scrubbed at his ass. His fingers slid over his anus, soaping the entrance up.

“Wash yourself out for me, come on,” Tony told him. Frowning sternly at Tony, Steve did just that. _Not_ because Tony told him to, but because it was good hygiene. Steve slipped his index finger inside himself, spreading the soap around. 

From his perch on the counter, Tony grinned. “You're totally doing it. I can tell. You made that face you make whenever I make you finger yourself.”

“You never _make_ me finger myself,” Steve grumbled. 

“That's right. You finger yourself _for_ me, don't you? Because you want me to see it. You want me to see you opening yourself up for me like the cockslut you are. Isn't that right, Rogers?”

Steve's dick was starting to get hard. Grumbling to himself, Steve removed his fingers from his ass and rinsed his hand and the soap off. Glancing up at the shower head, Steve sighed. Tony had one of those fancy waterfall showers: the type  _without_ a removable shower head. There was only one way to rinse his ass. 

Taking a step forward, Steve bent over and reached back with both hands to spread his ass cheeks to the shower. From over on the counter, Tony hollered: “You are  _so_ hot right now. Get over here and let me suck you, come on.”

Slapping off the shower, Steve stalked out until he was towering over Tony, dripping and naked. Tony was bouncing from foot to foot, hands raised up in supplication. 

“You really want to try and fuck me like this?” Steve growled.

“ _Yes_ ,” Tony begged.

“Fine.” Scooping Tony up with one hand (gently, _gently_ , even though he was irritated with the man just this second), Steve stomped over to Tony's king-sized bed. He deposited Tony in the middle, while he left to go back to the bathroom.

“Hey! Don't leave me here!” Tony whined. “Come on! I'm already hard, and I know you're getting there. Don't give me teeny-tiny blue balls!”

Steve retrieved a towel from the bathroom and scrubbed himself off with it as he returned to the bedroom. Tony brightened as soon as he saw him. 

“Yes, alright, big man! Come here. Sit on the bed, lemme suck your dick. When I get it hard enough I can probably sit on top of it, like a pony. Give a whole new meaning to 'ride your dick'. I can straddle it and suck on it at the same time.”

Steve scrubbed the towel through his hair then tossed it back into the bathroom. “Is your plan to dirty-talk me into having sex with you?”

“Has that ever failed,” Tony pointed out.

Steve glared at him, arms crossed over his chest, for a long moment. Then, because his penis was still half-hard and Tony looked like he was going to start  _talking_ again any minute, Steve sighed and got on the bed. Tony cheered. Then he stumbled across the bed on tiny, bare feet. 

Sighing, Steve pushed himself up to the headboard of Tony's overly-large bed and started piling pillows up behind himself. Tony continued to make his arduous journey across the bed to him. As he waited on Tony, Steve glanced at the nightstand next to him. After a brief, shameful argument with himself, Steve reached over and opened the dresser drawer. He pulled out lube and a condom, setting them next to his knee just as Tony reached him. 

“Not-uh. Put the condom back where you found it, Steve.”

Steve frowned. “But... if you really want to go inside me, don't you think it would be more sanitary-”

“Do you want me to suffocate?” 

Steve sighed and threw the condom back in the drawer. He turned back to Tony with a frown. “Well then what exactly did you have in mind? I'm not shoving your head into my ass without...”

Tony shook his head as he put his hands on Steve's thigh. His hands felt like fingertips, lightly tapping at his skin. “Just leave it all up to me. My engineering genius already has the particularities figured out.”

“If you're sure...” Steve grumbled. On his thigh, Tony bounced once, twice, three times, before swinging himself on top of it. Tony seemed pleased with himself, perched up on Steve's leg. He grinned up at him. 

“Hundred percent sure. Now shut up and let me concentrate on that dick of yours. Because from this size, it's making my mouth water. Not that it doesn't always, but.”

Steve relaxed a little against the pillows and headboard as Tony made his way across Steve's lap. Tony hopped on top of Steve's half-hard penis, spreading his legs across it and straddling it just like he said he would. Steve raised his eyebrows down at the sensation. It didn't hurt, but it wasn't exactly arousing. Not yet, at least.

Tony's hands ran up and down Steve's dick. Steve shifted at the sensation. It was like having one of Tony's fingers trail over his erection. When Tony leaned forward and ran a hand firmly over the vein on the underside, it felt better. After a moment Tony paused, cocking his head. Steve leaned forward, trying to see what he was doing.

Abruptly Tony held both arms above his head and waggled them. “Could you get me wet? I don't have enough saliva to get my whole... arms. Wet.”

Steve laughed. Carefully he leaned down and, stretching just  _slightly_ past what was comfortable, managed to take one of Tony's arms into his mouth. It felt about the same as taking one of Tony's fingers into his mouth, if longer. Steve sucked Tony's arm, getting it good and wet, then switched to the other one. Tony's little fingers tickled at the top of his tongue, stroking against the firm muscle. Steve laughed as he opened his mouth and released Tony's arm.

“Stop it,” he told Tony.

“What, you _don't_ like this?” Tony asked. He returned his attention to Steve's penis, running his arms up and down it. He wrapped both arms around the head of Steve's dick and hugged it tight, rolling back and forth around it. That felt pretty good. Like Tony had his index finger and thumb wrapped around the head of his dick. Except with the added friction of Tony's torso and legs hanging against the top of Steve's dick. Experimentally Steve thrust up, into the ring formed by Tony's arms. Tony laughed and whooped. 

“Go on! I think I got pretty good at 'riding the bull' over the years. If you know what I mean.”

“I know what you mean.”

“I mean your cock.”

“I know you mean my cock.”

“I mean sitting on top of you with your cock in my ass-”

Steve bucked up sharper than he had been, almost throwing Tony off. Tony yelped and then laughed, rubbing himself against Steve with renewed vigor. “What, my dirty-talk not doing it for you?”

Steve glanced down at Tony watching him virtually hump Steve's dick with his tiny, nude body. After a moment he stilled, causing Steve to frown and take notice. What happened next made Steve jump, and gasp. 

Tony grinned up from his spot directly over the tip of Steve's dick. “Told you you'd like my teeny tiny tongue lapping at the inside of your teeny tiny hole.” Tony dipped his head and lapped at Steve again, tongue flicking inside Steve's urethra. Steve gasped and clenched his fists against the mattress. That felt  _ weird _ . But definitely on the “good” end of the “weird” spectrum. 

Tony's arms were still slick and wrapped around Steve's erection, stroking up and down increasingly heated flesh as his tongue licked and licked at the inside of Steve's hole. 

“Tony... Don't... If the taste...” Steve managed to grunt out, ever-mindful of the comfort levels of his bed partner. 

But Tony shook his head and moaned, the deep, full noise sounding especially obscene coming from such a tiny body. He lifted his head just long enough to reassure Steve: “You taste like soap and skin, babe. Don't worry: I'm just as into this as you're getting.”

Lewdly Tony humped against Steve again, rubbing his hips up and down Steve's dick in the world's most miniature lap dance. “Can you feel me hard against you? I'm leaking, I can feel it. Leaking all over your giant dick.”

Steve groaned and leaned forward, eyes half-lidded and trained on Tony's body writhing against his penis. A bead of precome slipped out the tip of his dick, in a moment when Tony was pulled away and rubbing over him. 

Tony straightened up at the sight of the drop of fluid, balancing on the tip. “Oh, hello.” He leaned in close, blowing at it. The bubble of precome fluttered against Steve's slit, unbalancing for a moment but then righting itself. Steve shuddered and held still. 

Pushing himself up so he could get a better angle on it, Tony positioned his face directly over the top of Steve's penis. Then he leaned down, mouth spread wide open so he could capture the whole bead of precome in his mouth. He kept going once he swallowed it down, lowering his mouth so it was wrapped tight around the small slit at the tip of Steve's penis. Steve shuddered as Tony sucked as hard as his miniaturized lungs and mouth could at Steve's erection, tongue slipping inside Steve as he worked. 

“Damn, Tony,” Steve grunted. 

Tony rubbed himself rhythmically over Steve's erection as he sucked, body sliding up and down Steve's penis in fluid, sensual motions. He released Steve's penis with a nearly inaudible smack. 

“Can I suck cock or can I suck cock?” He grinned up at Steve.

Steve's cock twitched, another bead of precome slipping out of the tip. This time Tony spread it around, capturing it in his palm and rubbing it up and down Steve's penis. 

When Steve had just about as much teasing as he could stand, he wrapped his hands around Tony and lifted him, protesting, away from his leaking erection. He brought a pouting Tony up to eye-level and grinned shakily. “I know you've got it planned out in that big, little brain of yours, but I've got an idea first.”

Tony raised an eyebrow. “Like what?”

Gently Steve maneuvered Tony so he was sitting on Steve's palm. Then he brought Tony up to his mouth and licked one, firm stripe over his lap. Tony yelped, then groaned. He leaned back against Steve's palm, legs spread shamelessly in invitation. 

“Oh,  _ fuck _ ,” Tony groaned. Steve bent down and licked another stripe between Tony's legs. He could barely feel the difference between Tony's ass, perineum, balls, and cock at this size. But Tony could obviously enjoy the feel of Steve's tongue on him, judging by the way he was writhing and panting in Steve's palm. His hands flew back to wrap around Steve's fingers as he grunted and humped down against Steve's tongue. 

“Ah, fuck, Steve. Keep doing that, fuck.”

“How's it feel?” Steve asked, curious. He resumed his firm laps against Tony's groin as he waited for an answer. 

“Like...” Tony panted. “Like the best... Blow job and rim job... All at once. The pressure-” on a whim, Steve increased the pressure of his tongue slightly. Tony whined. “Ah, fuck, Steve: just like that. And, it's like... I can feel your  _ tastebuds _ , Steve. It's like getting blown by an octopus. With less suction.”

Steve had to pull away to laugh at that. Tony stared petulantly up at Steve from his palm. “Hey. What gives?”

Steve shook his head. “Are you planning on getting blown by an octopus anytime soon? Is that something on a list you have somewhere?”

Tony rolled his eyes. One hand had slipped between his legs and was stroking at his dick. “I've always got lists. Lists within lists. One of us getting hit by a tentacle ray and having to deal with that for a couple days could be on a list. I don't know: how am I supposed to remember every stupid idea I have?”

Steve hummed and bent down to lick at Tony a few more times. Tony moaned happily and let his hand drop away as Steve worked his tongue between his legs. “This isn't too bad of an idea,” Steve admitted to him.

“I'm glad you think so,” Tony groaned. “Because the next part is the best part.”

Steve pulled back, giving Tony a reprieve from his tongue. Tony grinned and pushed himself into a more upright sitting position. “Come on, big boy.” Tony tapped at Steve's palm. “Lube me up. Next step is the best.”

Steve frowned down at Tony. “I still don't understand why you want to... be _inside_...”

Tony held up his hands and wiggled his fingers. “Because I want to rub my teeny tiny fingers over the part of your rectum that your prostate is behind. Come on, don't you want that? It's like microgastric dining, except with _sex_.”

Steve raised an eyebrow. “I thought bigger was always better with sex,” he deadpanned.

Tony smacked his hands against Steve's. It tickled. 

“I'm fourteen inches long. You fuck yourself with me, and you'll get 'bigger'. Even on my best days I can't compare to that.”

“Even in your wildest fantasies you can't compare to that,” Steve shot back. Then he sighed and ran his free hand through his hair. “Okay. We can _try_ it. But the second you feel a twinge, or a muscle bending in the wrong way, or _anything_...”

“Yes, yes, Dr. Rogers. I will be super careful with my physical well-being while my boyfriend fucks himself with me like the world's most expensive dildo.”

As Steve brought Tony back down to the bed sheet, he pointed out, “I'm not paying for you.”

Tony snorted, a hint of the elitist creeping into his voice. “You couldn't afford me.”

Then he raised his hands up and danced around. “Lube me up!”

Steve laughed and reached for the lube. Carefully he poured a palmful out, warming it up for a moment before reaching for Tony. He didn't want Tony to catch cold, after all. It took two palmfuls before Tony was good and slick, lube dripping off him. Tony grinned and grabbed at the lube bottle, hauling it across the bed with him as he approached Steve's lap. 

“Okay. Lie back and think of America while I open you up.”

Obediently Steve laid back against his pillows, shifting his hips up so Tony had unrestricted access to his ass. After a moment he sat up and grabbed a pillow to put it under his hips, lifting his ass for a more optimal angle. Tony cooed approvingly as he approached, lube bottle in tow. 

“I figure my arms are about the width of my finger when I'm normal-sized,” Tony mused as he settled in front of Steve's anus. “But longer. Which _I_ think will...” Steve gasped, hips tilting up as Tony's arm breached his anus. From beneath him, Tony laughed. “Hey, hey, Steve. Check this out.” Steve felt the sensation of Tony's arm moving inside him, a ball forming on the end. Tony's fingers curling into a fist. “I'm fisting you.”

Steve huffed into his pillow. “You are  _ not _ telling people that.”

“I am _so_ telling people this. People like Rhodey. And Sam. And Jan.”

“You are _not_ telling Jan-ah!” Steve twitched as a second finger—no. Not a finger. A second _arm_ entered him. The two arms inside him moved differently than Tony's fingers. More independently of each other, bending in odd directions that he wasn't used to. And the nubs at the end, Tony's fists. Those were doing some interesting things to his inner walls. Like anal beads, but smaller. Gently Steve fucked himself down onto Tony's arms, testing out how hard he could go, how maneuverable Tony was inside of him. 

“You breathing okay down there?” Steve panted out.

“Yeah, yeah.” Tony's voice was a little muffled, but calm. “I kinda got my face shoved up against your ass, but no where my face hasn't been before. I can't do this forever, but it's fine for now. Hey, where the hell is your prostate. I'd thought I would have found it by now.”

Steve shook his head. “No, not... your angle is different. Curl your fi- your arms, up. Towards my penis.”

Steve could practically  _ hear _ the eye roll in Tony's voice. “I know where the  _ prostate _ is, Steve, asshole. I  _ am _ curling my arms up... hang on...”

The firm points of pressure that were Tony's fists started to draw out of Steve's ass. Suddenly he groaned, rolling down against Tony. “Oh, there it is. Tony.”

“ _Ha_.” Now that he had it, Tony was massaging the area vigorously, fists rolling firmly over Steve's rectum with purpose. “My arms were too far in. They're longer than my fingers when I'm full grown. Overshot it. But now that I've got it...” His arms fucked Steve faster, fists massaging his inner walls. Steve groaned and reached down to stroke his penis. It wasn't the same as Tony opening him up with his fingers, but it sure did the trick.

“Alright, I think you're ready for the main event.” 

Steve sighed as Tony removed his arms from inside him. He peered down between his legs. Tony's head popped up, whole body still slick with lube, hair plastered down with a combination of the viscous fluid and sweat.

“I still don't understand how this is going to work,” Steve protested.

Tony winked up at Steve. “Feet first. Here, wrap your hand around me, come on.”

Carefully Steve reached down and wrapped one hand around Tony. At first he made to reach under Tony's arms, but Tony shook his head. “Arms down. Help make me a little thicker. I may be longer than my dick, but I'm not much thicker, I don't think.” Steve adjusted his grip so his hand was wrapped around Tony's torso, arms and all. Tony smiled up at him.

“Okay, now shove me into your ass, feet first. I figure we'll start with one leg...” Tony demonstrated by tucking one knee up under himself. “And then move onto two, since my legs are thicker than my arms.”

Steve shrugged and shook his head. “Alright, Tony. You're the ideas man. I'll give it a go.”

Carefully Steve lifted his hips and lowered Tony down between his legs. Tony was ready with right leg stuck straight out and his left leg curled up. After taking a breath, Steve carefully positioned Tony in front of his hole and pushed in.

After Tony's two arms, his leg wasn't difficult to slip inside. Steve fucked himself with it for a moment, getting a feel for the motion and sensation inside him. It didn't feel much different from getting fingered, except with a much longer finger than either he or Tony had. That was a good difference. Steve groaned and fucked himself a little harder with Tony's leg.

“Feeling it?”

Steve groaned. “Yeah. Yeah, it feels good. Do you want-” He tugged Tony out of himself. Tony was already lowering his left leg in anticipation of Steve's request.

Both of Tony's legs in was better. Steve grunted and canted his hips higher, fucking himself steadily with Tony's legs. “How's it... Is this okay?” he asked, checking on Tony.

“Oh yeah,” Tony confirmed. “Keep going. This is crazy hot.”

Even as he fucked himself harder with Tony's legs, a twinge of guilt went through Steve. “I should have gotten you off first,” he lamented.

“Lists within lists,” Tony reminded Steve. “Fuck yourself with me, and then you'll see what else I've got planned.”

Steve grunted to himself and groaned. Well: he trusted Tony in the field. That trust carried over to the bedroom, too.

“I bet you can fit more of me inside you,” Tony egged Steve on. “You've only got up to my thighs. Put my ass in you.”

Steve half groaned, half laughed as he slowly rotated Tony further inside himself. He twisted Tony's body, carefully, sliding him in another inch. Then he pulled him out and pushed him back in again, more firmly. Slowly his body relaxed to accommodate Tony's. A few gentle thrusts, Steve's wrist working steadily between his legs, and he felt Tony's ass slip through his tight ring of muscle and inside.

“Ha!” Tony laughed. “Yes!”

Steve groaned and tossed his head back as he fucked himself with Tony. “ _Yes_.” Steve's wrist worked faster, fucking Tony into himself. With his left hand he fumbled for the lube, popping the bottle open and dribbling it over his cock. He stroked his dick as he thrust Tony faster into his ass, arousal building. 

“You still okay?” he checked on Tony.

“Fantastic,” Tony panted. He sounded a little winded, but genuinely okay. Steve relaxed into masturbating (or, sex, technically), knowing it wouldn't be long now. Tony's legs were penetrating further into him than his cock ever did, rolling over his insides, rubbing against his hot, slick, inner walls. His hips and waist were thick inside Steve, pressed up against the tight muscle of his anus and filling it, stretching it out. Steve grunted and squeezed his eyes shut, fucking himself over and over again with Tony's body. 

He pulled Tony out just before he came, worried that he'd fracture something of Tony's if he clenched around him. Tony made a little protesting noise from the bed, but Steve was too busy fucking his fist to pay him any mind. Thick ropes of come striped his chest, dribbling down Steve's cock and hand as his orgasm died down. He lay there panting for a moment, loosely stroking his cock as his heart pounded against his chest.

Little fingerpads of pressure ran over his balls, making him twitch from overstimulation. Steve huffed and lifted his neck, looking down between his legs. Tony was running his hands over Steve's ball sack, and pressing little kisses to it as he waited. 

“You said you had a plan?” Steve asked. “Getting off?”

Tony grinned and climbed up onto Steve's leg, then started making his way up Steve's body with unsteady steps. He stopped on Steve's stomach to lap up a mouthful of come, barely making a dent in the paint job Steve had given himself. Steve grimaced at how filthy he was, now. Between his come and the lube Tony was spreading all over his chest with every step, he was going to need another shower immediately after this.

Balancing up on Steve's sternum, Tony started jacking himself off. Steve raised an eyebrow as he watched. “This is the plan?”

“I want to shoot in your mouth,” Tony explained. He had one eye shut as he concentrated. “I figure I'll come basically a drop's worth of jizz at this size, and I want you to swallow it. Because you _never_ swallow it, and this _one time_ I figure I can make you.”

Steve laughed. Maybe it was the endorphins from the orgasm, or maybe it was because he was in love with a ridiculous man who was currently fourteen inches tall, but Steve was feel particularly amenable just then. “You want me to swallow your ejaculate?” he clarified.

Tony nodded, hand working faster between his legs. “ _Fuc_ \- yeah. You always complain about the taste and how if you die an hour from now you are not dying with my jizz in your stomach. Well, guess what: it's not going to be enough to taste, or show up in an autopsy, so I want you to drink my come, Rogers, for  _once_ .”

Steve huffed and ran a hand through his sweat-damp hair. Then he nodded and tilted his head up. “Fine. Go ahead.”

“Really?” Tony's grin was infectious.

“Really,” Steve grumbled, no actual grouchiness behind his tone.

“Talk dirty to me.”

“Tony...”

Tony whined. “No, come on, Steve! Get me off: I'm doing all the work, here. Just tell me a little something. What are you gonna do to me when I'm full-sized again?”

Steve reached out with a gentle finger and ran it over Tony's head, brushing his hair back. “Probably hug you, once the doctors have run all their tests.”

“ _Steve_.”

“And kiss you,” Steve admitted. He sighed and cast about for something dirty to say without embarrassing himself. “And... make love to you. Of course. Once we're back home.”

“You gonna fuck me?”

“I'm going to make love to you,” Steve insisted. Corrected.

“Shit, shit. Gonna come. Steve, pick me up, please-”

Hurriedly Steve scooped Tony up and aimed his hips directly over his mouth. Tony came with a groan, the smallest glob of ejaculate spurting from his dick and into Steve's mouth. Steve swallowed on instinct, but Tony was right: he couldn't taste much of anything. Maybe a hint of bitterness? But nothing to write home about. 

“Fuck, thank you, babe. Ugh, that was hot.”

Tony was collapsing against Steve's face, hugging it tight. Steve laughed and let him lie there for a moment, one arm thrown over his nose, head nuzzled up against Steve's eyebrow. 

“Where do you want to sleep?” Steve asked. Tony's leg moved with his mouth as he spoke.

“Right here,” Tony mumbled sleepily.

Steve sighed. But he was smiling, he knew Tony could feel it. He brought a hand up and placed it on top of Tony, stroking him carefully where he was resting. After a minute or two Tony's breathing evened out, his soft snores tickling the hairs in Steve's eyebrows. Carefully Steve lifted him up with two hands and deposited him on top of a pillow on his side of the bed. Steve hopped out of bed to the bathroom to clean himself up. When he returned, he grabbed an old Captain America t-shirt of his and tucked it over the still-sleeping form of Tony, nestled comfortably on his pillow bed. Steve leaned down and pressed a kiss to his little head, then returned to his side of the bed.

Life sure got weird on them, at times. But at least Tony knew how to make the best of a bizarre situation.

 


End file.
